My Usual Response

Nowadays, every time I chat with my friends through YM or on corridor chit chats, they always ask me about the impending birth of my baby.  Most of them ask if I am excited and of course I aver my excitement.  But I always respond that I am also scared.  One of my friends did not hesitate to advice me on what to do.  She said that we should be prepared with the bags for all our stuff so that we will have it all at a moment's notice.  I told her that we already are as prepared as we could however that was not I was scared about.  I am more scared on failing in my duty as a father, and to an extent a failure as a co-parent.  It's scares me because this little human being would depend on both my wife and I for everything, for his own life.

I am sure that if there is an evaluation on parenthood my wife will pass with flying colors, I don't think I could say the same for me.  I am not even sure if I am mature enough.  At 32 (very soon, 33) I don't think that I have mature enough to be a dad.  I am apprehensive but I am not terrified though.  They say that once this is thrust to us at the point of no return, all parental instincts will kick in and the compulsion to be the best for that little baby will be irresistible.

I believe that I will be prepared somehow and I promise to do my best because with this, there is no "try".  There is no turning back.  This needs a ton of prayers.